The Obstacles to Getting a Man

There is no need to make dating full of twists and turns. But, as hard as they try, some women will still have trouble keeping and finding a man. There will be more than a few reasons why this is so. For one, some girls just do not know what to do. Also, it can be easy to fall for some of the everyday obstacles to dating.

09.16.2011 Seattle, WA - Adriane Henderson goes to a relationship coach every week. "She taught me how to focus on myself. I learned that I should make myself happy and not just my partner. That is not something I have heard from a coach in the past." Henderson also recommends a visit to the site - www.meetyoursweet.com.

Found below are a few of the most typical obstacles to finding a man.

1. Being a Pessimistic Sally. It is only normal for a person to want to whine about things. We whine about the poor economy, our horrible bosses, how awfully we are treated, etc. It will not help you in any way, but many people use as a stress relief technique. It makes us feel worse than we already do. You are going to turn off your date if you keep complaining. In its place, try to keep yourself from complaining. When you are still mastering how to find a boyfriend, try to view things in a 'glass half full' way.

2. Being Overly Demanding on Yourself. We have a lot of critics, but the one inside is the worst one. When you are still learning how to get a boyfriend, you should stop being extremely critical of yourself. You will need to take a look at the constructive as an alternative to the negative. Listen to him and pay attention to whatever it is that he is sharing.

3. The Needy Trap. If you act extremely needy and too clingy, no one is going to like you. Value your independence first so that you do not become that girl. Before you look for a guy, have a life first. Have friends and let him have his. Don't ditch them the instant that you and your man want to get serious.

4. Being a Doormat. Ladies, make sure that you keep your own opinion about things. Don't force anything if something does not feel right. Never allow your man to walk all over you. You should never be coddling him either.

5. Forcing Commitment. When you are learning how to get a guy, the first thing you should realize is that you cannot make someone do something they don't like. You shouldn't force commitment on a guy if he does not want it. Instead, you will need to look into making your relationship as healthy as possible. One where you and the guy are both happy and satisfied.

Resources:

http://www.meetyoursweet.com/women/articles/meet-your-sweet-for-women/how-to-find-a-boyfriend/
http://www.meetyoursweet.com/women/articles/meet-your-sweet-for-women/how-to-get-a-boyfriend/
http://www.meetyoursweet.com/women/articles/meet-your-sweet-for-women/how-to-get-a-guy/

About the Author

Jones Spores is a multi-awarded writer of various articles and different press releases. he has uplifted honesty in his work, may it be a product to sell or a service to be rendered. He reveals the truth in every product so people may know of it.

I'm so desperate for a girlfriend

I'm so desperate for a girlfriend

Have you heard the following statements before, "I'm so desperate for a girlfriend!  I'm so desperate for a boyfriend?"  I'm sure you have!  What about you, are you desperate for a girlfriend/boyfriend?

If you look around you, you tend to see many males and females desperate to get into a relationship.  Some of this desperation is a result of lack self esteem, lack of love, peer pressure, and lack of interest in life.  Many individuals think they will never be able to attract someone they can love and be loved in return, so they feel hopeless in life.

I'm so desperate for a girlfriend/boyfriend

To deal with this kind of desperation, first we need to analyze the root cause of why so many girls are so desperate for a boyfriend and so many guys are desperate for a girlfriend.

1.  Lack of self esteem

People, who have low self esteem, feel negative about their life, career, relationships, or any other area of life, so they become desperate for a romantic relationship so they can feel better about themselves and compensate for what they lack in one or more of the areas in life.

If you fall in this category, then you need to start developing your self esteem.  Being in a relationship will not build your self esteem, however, overcoming your limiting beliefs about yourself, learning optimism, and learning new skills will.

Let me ask you something, let's say you get in a relationship now while you have low self esteem and you become happy in the moment, then suddenly, your partner breaks up with you and leaves you all alone.  What will happen then?  If you have low self esteem, then it will hit bottom low, but if you have high self esteem, you will move on in a short period and realize this was only an experience.

2.  Peer pressure

Peer pressure is another root cause for why some girls become so desperate for a boyfriend and some guys desperate for a girlfriend.

For example, if a girl is single, but has a group of girlfriends who all have boyfriends, they might start pressuring the single girl into getting in a relationship.  They might say something like "Why don't you have a boyfriend?  Can't you get a guy?  Are you a loser?"  If the single girl has low self esteem, then such questions might have a huge negative effect on her and she might become so desperate to get a boyfriend.

If you have some friends who are pressuring you to get into a relationship then, you might want to consider spending less time with them and work on getting new friends who support you.  True friends are the ones who support you, not pressure you into getting in a relationship when you are not ready for it.

3.  Depending on someone for your happiness

Some people are so desperate to find someone to love, so they can feel happy.  What they fail to realize is that happiness is an internal state, not external.

I explained in my book "How to win your lover's heart" that your boyfriend or girlfriend are not responsible for your happiness, you are.  As long as you stay depending on your partner for your happiness, you will never become truly happy.  Yes for sure their love can and will enhance your life, but true source of happiness is internal which means you are responsible for it.

Begin to love and show compassion to yourself instead of being so desperate to find a partner.  When you begin to treat yourself in a compassionate and loving way, others will see that about you and then when someone shows up in your life, your relationship together will be much happier.

Now, that you know the main causes for someone who is desperate for a girlfriend or a boyfriend, you need to start taking some steps to stop being desperate.  If your self esteem is low, then work on improving your self esteem before you get into a relationship.  If you are looking for someone to make you happy, then start by making yourself happy first.  Remember, all the answers that you seek are within you internally, not externally.

About the Author

http://www.2achieveyourgoals.com

Do you know that only 3% of the world's population manage to plan and reach their goals? The main goal for 2achieveyourgoals.com is to help you become from the top 3% of the world's population who know how to achieve any goal they desire in all areas of life. If you have a specific goal that you want to accomplish or want to improve an area of your life, but do not know how or why you are not getting any result, then this is the place for you.

How To React When You Meet Your Boyfriend's Ex

Wouldn't it be so much easier if every relationship in our past had ended on a good note? Unfortunately that is not always the case. Often relationships end and in the bargain we hurt our exes. But an even more unfortunate part is when these past relationships tend to effect and influence our present relationships. Your boyfriend's ex-girlfriend is someone whom may have the power to create insecurity in your relationship. Here are few ways how you should react when you meet your boyfriend ex.

Firstly treat her like just somebody else. You don't have to behave with her in a different manner because she is your boyfriend's ex. Just like how you have a past, so does she. Just because she is your boyfriend's ex, it doesn't make her a bitch. So treat her with respect. This doesn't mean that you have to over do it. Don't go out of your way to be sweet to her, because that will only make her suspicious. No matter how hard it is for you, act normal. Try to hide any kind of awkwardness. If your boyfriend is with you, while she is around. Avoid getting too mushy with him, or she may think that you doing that only to make her jealous. When he introduces you to her, don't put on that bitchy face or try to pass on your catty message to her via telepathy. You trying to do that, will only prove that you are insecure about her. Instead smile confidently and shake hands with her just like you would if he introduced a friend to you. If the situation permits and you are forced to talk to her, keep the conversation very general. Avoid talking about personal issues, especially the topic about your boyfriend. There are so many things that two girls can talk about, for example the weather, food, shopping, etc. Talk to her the way you would talk to any other girlfriend. Two girls can surely have fun, even if she is your boyfriend's ex-girlfriend, provided you treat her like just another girl. If you are not enjoying, talk for a little time, make a good excuse and go somewhere else. If you are enjoying her company nothing is wrong to continue talking to her. At the end finish the conversation and say a kind goodbye to her.

Your boyfriend's ex can be a very important factor to cause insecurities and various problems in your current relationship. Hence behave in the right manner and you will have the power to shrug off so many possible problems, far away.

About the Author

The author writes quizzes for girls on love and dating. He also writes relationship advice for those who are seeking guidance in love. He is also a contributing blogger on relationships in mag for women.