Relationships | dating: what men want

Showing posts with label what men want. Show all posts

Monday, August 1, 2011

What Men Want In A Woman: A Dreamer

What men want in a woman is someone who is a dreamer. Someone who is a dreamer aspires to become better than they already are. They are someone who is not content with where they are currently at and are looking to improve themselves. More importantly, they can see into the distant and picture where they want to be and are willing to work towards that goal. Men love it if their woman has a vision that she can provide him with which will give them both some direction to work towards through their years together. Sure, there's nothing wrong with being content right here and now, but having goals to work towards really gets men feeling passionate about their marriage. Why is dreaming so important in a marriage?

1. Self-Improvement

If you dream, that means that you can see beyond the now. You also are able to plan and break up your dream into tiny, actionable steps that are realistic and measurable. You also have ambition, which allows you to try harder than ever before in your job or your life.

Having a married couple where the man and woman both dream is a great thing to behold. There is a certain buzz of energy that encompasses the couple and they're the ones who get the most out of life.

2. Foresight

Being able to see where you want to go is an important part of being a dreamer. Women who have foresight are pretty common, but what's uncommon is having a woman who is able to get one step close to that vision every day. It takes hard work, but it's doable.

If you're an action taker and you want to get to your dreams sooner, letting your man know what you aspire to is a great way to build your marriage. He can be your accountability partner and see if you're getting any closer to your goal or not every day.

3. The Determination

This is possibly the most important ingredient of realizing your dreams. If you don't have the determination to persevere, then it doesn't matter how often you dream or how great your idea is, you won't get any closer to it.

Expect tough, bad times. If you're realistic and conservative as well, you can also make better and faster progress towards your dreams. But pummeling through the impediments is crucial to getting there. Always tell your man if you're struggling and he'll be happy to support you. Do the same for him too, OK?

What men want in a woman is someone who is a dreamer and an action taker. If she puts in the effort to really chase her dreams, then she'll go far in life. Her man will love her more for that, because two is always better than one when it comes to reaching for higher goals.

About the Author

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What Men Want In A Woman No 68: An Irate Woman

What men want in a woman is someone who is always constantly irate and finding problems with everything. Now obviously I'm exaggerating a little bit here. There is nothing attractive about someone who is always angry and finding problems with every little thing that they see in another person. This sort of person is generally unbearable and they'll be lucky to find anyone who can tolerate them. Having said that, anger does have its crucial place in a relationship. In fact, if there is no animosity whatsoever in a relationship, you can expect that relationship to not be as healthy as a couple who argues regularly. Here are three reasons why.

1. They're Actually Aware Of Each Other

There is nothing worse than getting married to someone that you barely know, even if you've spent years and years with them. You might scoff and laugh, but I assure you, it happens more often than you would expect.

These people marry out of social reasons and not out of love. They don't care that they're even together. It's a marriage out of convenience. Lack of anger shows lack of any connection. They might as well be single.

2. They're Actually Communicating

Let's go one step further. If they're angry, that shows that they have their differences, which all couples have in a relationship. Getting over differences and compromising is a key skill of any kind of relationship.

Anger is one of the best vehicles to solve differences quickly. Being angry with each other is better than ignoring the problem. If you ignore it, it simply stays there, getting worse and worse until it simply tears the couple apart.

3. They're Working Together

To complete this set of points, we can see that anger is actually important to work together and solve problems. If no one feels angry about anything, then there is no conflict. This isn't necessarily a good thing, though. The more conflicts that people get over, the better they will be at handling bigger problems down the track.

It allows the couple to function happily and healthily and to sort out their problems without animosity in the future. All relationships will go through these speed humps and anger is actually a great tool for growth in both parties.

What men want in a woman is someone who is angry. She will raise her problems with her husband, they will sort through it and then they can live happily ever after. If they sort through their problems like this, this shows that they are both emotionally developed and can stand the test of time with each other as a married couple.

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What Men Want In A Woman No 66: A Master

What men want in a woman is someone who is going to be a master to them. Of course, this doesn't mean that us guys are all slaves. You will never read this in any relationship book, but us guys ultimately are in relationships to be controlled. Why would we choose to marry one particular woman over the over hundreds of millions of women out there? Ultimately, it's because she knows how to make us happy. What makes a man more happy than anything else in the world? Having someone to fight for and defend, by virtue of our provider instinct. Here's how to be a better master to your slave, I mean husband.

1. Don't Abuse Your Power

I don't seem to be doing too many favors for my fellow men out there by saying that we're slaves. However, I'm only saying this because it's what I have found to be true in all the successful relationships with friends that I have observed, as well as my own.

Women who wear the pants in the relationship are way in over their heads. Men let them do so. If women try to show their dominance, men will simply ignore them. You can be our master, but you have to respect us.

2. Shared Control

A marriage isn't a real master/slave relationship per se. The control has to be shared. Women have to ask things from men and it has to occur vice versa as well. Otherwise, the relationship will head straight towards a divorce.

If women simply ask men for everything, then the value of the man will drop. Ladies, let your man know that you can and will do certain things for him. Sometimes, us guys get complacent and we forget that it's fair. If it's getting too one-sided, do the right thing and give him a bit of power.

3. We Want To Be Controlled

Marriage gives power to both the man and the woman but there's always one thing that's universally true when someone chooses to get married and that's they actually want to serve the other person.

This is particularly true for men. We want to serve the wife and to be controlled by her. We feel like we're needed if she chooses us to do things for her. Just remember, respect always has to be mutual. It takes as much strength to follow as it does to lead.

What men want in a woman is someone who knows how to control us. Remember, us men want to be controlled, but if the woman feels that the relationship is one-sided, she should give us a bit of power back so that the man realises that it takes two to tango.

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Sunday, July 31, 2011

What Men Want In A Woman No 49: Women Who Are Always Right

What men want in a woman is someone who thinks they are always right. Now, this is something that is usually considered a pretty annoying trait to have. People who think they are always right are cocky, hard to deal with and just a plain pain in the butt. So why do I love it that my wife thinks she's always right? Well, what's the alternative? Someone who's entirely subservient and has no opinion and no passion to support her view. Someone who thinks they are always right has conviction, even if their opinion is considered wrong. I'll talk about more reasons why your man secretly thinks it's good if you think you're always right.

1. You're not boring

With women who have an opinion and always think that they're in the right, it's never a dull moment with them. You can stay up with them all night, talking about this and that and they'll always have their own opinion.

That's a lot better than having a woman who agrees with everything you say. Could you imagine how quiet the house would be? That's not fun at all.

2. You communicate

Women who have an opinion talk more (than usual). If they talk more, we talk more. Communication increases and the connection between the two people generally get stronger.

Again, someone who has no opinion on anything can't be argued with. I personally think that I would rather have a quarrel than settle for someone who has nothing to say. Some men may differ from me, but in general, I think communicating is a good thing.

3. They can agree with you

Only because these women think that they are always right, it doesn't mean that they can't agree with you at the same time. Intelligent women can hold two opposing views simultaneously and appreciate the reasons that support them.

It's safe to say that in general, us guys like intelligent women. Intelligent women usually also are quite emotionally strong. They don't lean entirely on one opinion and get emotionally caught up in supporting it.

What men want is a woman who is always right. Yes, we will argue more with her. Yes, we won't always get along with her, but the alternative is so much more boring. As harsh as it sounds, women who have no opinion are more boring and it's hard to establish a connection with them.

About the Author

What Men Want In A Woman No 54: A Member Of EQ Mensa

What men want in a woman is someone who is an "emotional genius." Now what can I be talking about this time? Have you heard of the group, Mensa? It's basically a group for gifted people with an extremely high IQ in a particular field. Now, this field is for people with a high IQ (98th percentile), but there is no category for a high EQ. In the last few decades or so, it has been repeatedly proven however that people with a high EQ get more out of life than those with a high IQ. This is even more so the case in a relationship. Let's see why this is the case.

1. Response-ability Defined

People with a high EQ realize that their entire world is shaped by how they response to everything. You could be living on the same world as me, but living on an entirely different planet, depending on how you view the world.

The easiest example is the whole "half empty, half full" paradox. You have a glass with water half way. Is half empty, or half full? Supposedly, people with a negative outlook on life would say half empty, while those who are positive say half full. Which one are you?

2. Response-ability Examples

There are examples of people with a high IQ who have a low EQ. Geniuses who are stuck at university or college but don't have the skills to make friends often commit crimes to get attention (or for other reasons beyond comprehension).

That's extreme. In the scope of a relationship, someone who is response-able knows how to react to someone who's angry, sad, happy, disappointed, stressed out, etc. This skill ensures that the relationship always stays on track and that every event in the relationship builds it up.

3. Self-Awareness

This is sort of like response-ability but only for yourself. Have you had those times where you feel completely overwhelmed by what's happening around you? At the time of writing this article, there have been some natural disasters happening all over the world. I can't help but feel like I should be doing something.

Of course, you calm down eventually and you realize that you're doing what you can. Some people let it get to them and it stresses them out. It really isn't that bad, as long as you're aware of where you fit in the world. It's exactly the same for relationships. You might feel that it's bad, but then you realize that some people have no one, or have so much less than you do.

What men want in a woman is someone who is an emotional genius. She is response-able, self-aware and in general, is more complete an individual than other people. Men need women who are emotional geniuses to have a healthy relationship.

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What Men Want In A Woman No 62: Female Happiness

What men want in a woman is happiness. Depression is a big problem in both genders; for men, the main issues are not being able to adequately provide and getting pressure at work. For women, the main issues are being overwhelmed by their emotions and letting doubt and fear get the better of them. If you consider yourself a woman who isn't happy enough, then maybe some of the following three situations may be a problem for you.

1. Dropping affection from your man

This is a problem that affects women all over the world, simply because they feel that their man are distancing themselves away from their women over time. This is a normal occurrence in all relationships, yet some women let it get to them to a greater extent.

Take it from a man who's going through it right now. This is actually what's going through my head, since I've been noticing it in my own marriage too: I'm not loving my wife less, I'm realizing that now that we're spending more time than ever together, our time apart is all the more that valuable. I want to appreciate her more, which is why I'm spending less time with her.

2. What If This Happens?...

Another problem which plagues both genders is the occurrence of a disaster. If you're anything like me, then you will have had those negative thoughts plaguing through your head. Even when I was young, I would always think, "If my parents died tomorrow, would I be able to look after myself and my little brother?"

Now, the problem is, "if I died tomorrow, would my wife be able to look after our daughter?" I don't know what conversation goes on inside your head, but what I do to calm down is that I forget about it. The time I spend stressing out over "what ifs" is time I could spend playing with my daughter and enjoying time with my wife.

3. Is He Into Her... Or Her... Or Her?

Again, this is another problem that all people face. Arguably, women face it more, but only if they're more insecure or unhappy with themselves.

Ladies, it's actually OK if guys check out other women. It doesn't mean he's less interested in you at all. That shouldn't stop you from doing the same either. If both people can do it, they have an open, honest relationship, which is better than being jealous any day. Be happy that you can do that at all, some countries prevent you from talking at the opposite gender lest you want to be hurt.

What men want in a woman is someone who is happy with themselves. This comes from taking life less seriously, not stressing out over hypothetical situations and not assuming the worst if your man seems to not pay as much attention to you. If you confront him that will actually make him love you less since it will show him that you're insecure.

About the Author

What Men Want In A Woman No 57: A Realist

What men want in a woman is someone who is a realist. Now, I'm not talking about property (realtor) or realism (arts), I'm talking about a realist in the sense that they are realistic about their relationship with their man. There are several women in the world who float through life, never being fully aware of themselves, nor their man. They get married, simply for the thrill of marriage and wonder where it all went a few years down the track. Women who face reality not only stand to have more satisfying marriages, they also build stronger relationships with their husbands as well. Here are three situations where you have to face the facts.

1. Your man can leave/die at any moment.

I don't want to scare you, but your husband can die at any moment, like right now when you finish reading this sentence. As much as you want a man that you can rely on, you just never know.

That's why it's so important to be thankful and to always make the most of what you have all the time. If you truly, truly understand that every moment is precious, this feeling will be communicated across to your man and he will feel your love (which he will willingly reciprocate).

2. Half of all marriages end up in divorce.

This is sadly another fact of life. People simply don't treat marriage with the respect that they used to do back in the day. Now I'm no old codger, but I didn't get married on a whim. I didn't go to Vegas and marry the first call girl that I saw.

Even if I didn't do that, there's a good chance that I might not make it with my wife down the track. Women who also face this fact appreciate their man for who they are, not who they think they should be.

3. You're Not Perfect.

This is a tough pill to swallow for a lot of women. There's nothing wrong with being the dominant one in a relationship, as long as it doesn't make you think that you're only the dominant one because you're "better" than he is.

Women who realize they aren't perfect constantly try to improve themselves. They are on a more level playing field with their husband, they respect themselves more, which means they also get more respect from their husbands. It's better for them, overall.

What men want in a woman is someone who is realistic. If they're realistic, they have more to get out of the relationship because they're more aware of what there is in the relationship in the first place.

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What Men Want In A Woman No 50: Conviction For Us

What men want in a woman is someone who has conviction for their husband. This is an important characteristic that helps to build up the respect and love a husband has for his wife. As cocky and arrogant as we can be at times, men will always look for a woman who will support them when times are tough. Men embrace their role as the breadwinner, but it takes a particular kind of woman to make sure that their man keeps bringing in the dough. Here's three ways to show your support for your man that will make him really appreciate you.

1. Help Out

Us guys can be particular proud and that sometimes gets in the way of our better judgment. Some men do not like their wives helping out in particular tasks but more often than not, he would appreciate you more if you ignored his pigheadedness and did your part.

Some guys completely embrace the "provider" role, but what they realize that they're doing is actually decreasing the respect you have for them. With you helping out, you show that appreciate his hard work and make the marriage work like a partnership ought to work.

2. Undying Support

Nothing makes us feel more warm and fuzzy inside than knowing that our wife is supporting us, especially behind our backs. They say that true respect occurs when you don't bad-mouth someone, even when they're not there and that's especially true for marriages.

For instance, if you're out with girlfriends, they might remark upon how you don't come to parties with her. We might not know what you tell them, but we do know that your support for us makes our hard work that much more rewarding.

3. You're Our Shield

This is like the point above except a bit more severe. Some people get a lot of negative criticism, especially when it seems like the wife is being ignored. Unless the man is an idiot, he would never intentionally ignore his wife.

Defend us and let whoever is attacking us behind our backs know who they're messing with. Again, we'll appreciate you all the more for that.

What men want in a woman is someone who is willing to defend us until the ends of the earth. There is nothing more heartening to a man than a woman who is going to be there for him, even if he is short on time for her.

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What Men Want In A Woman No 42: A Growing Partner

What men want in a woman is someone who is there to not only nurture the relationship, but to also nurture and help the man grow. You rarely get into a relationship where you don't influence each other in some way, shape or form. Unless there is virtually no interaction with your partner whatsoever, there will be some growth along the way. Since it will occur anyway, why not maximize the potential and make it so that you grow as much as possible in the time that you're together? Here are three ways that you can help your man grow, which will make him love you more as a result:

1. Dreams

Everyone has dreams. Everyone daydreams about where they would rather be, who they would rather be. Thankfully for you, at least they already are with the person they would rather be with.

So many people never live out their dreams, simply because they don't have what's called an accountability partner. An accountability partner is someone you report to at the end of the day who can gauge your progress. If you don't have one, you'll never turn your dreams into actionable goals.

2. Health

This one is obvious but again, so few people actually do it. When you're living with your partner, you obvious want to foster an environment that will allow children to grow (for the majority of us, anyway).

What you eat will reflect what your children eat. What you say will reflect what your children say. What you think will reflect what your children think. Do you think how you're currently interacting with your partner promotes the healthiest environment, in terms of physical, mental and emotional health?

3. Imperfections

This is somewhat related to dreams, but is more of a "local" and everyday thing. Your man can't achieve what he wants to do due to certain traits that he has. If you're serious about helping him reach his peak, you will identify his imperfections and help him work on them.

This is really key for you as an accountability partner. As a 3rd party, you have a better perspective of him than he does, so you're in the best position to help him out. It all starts with little things like laziness, procrastination and forgetfulness. Iron these traits out and he will appreciate you for it.

What men want in a woman is someone who will grow with them. If the wife can help a man achieve his dreams, promote a healthy environment to live in and help iron out the kinks in his traits.

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What Men Want In A Woman No 45: A Nice Pair Of Ears

What men want in a woman is someone who knows how to use their ears. Obviously what I'm referring to is listening. But hold on... isn't the man usually the one who gets in trouble for not listening? Why shouldn't men be given this mark of respect too? Only because we mess around, act silly and say stupid things, doesn't mean that we don't deserve your attention either. I know that when my wife doesn't listen to me, I get annoyed too. Do you hate how you have to repeat yourself? Guess what? Men do too. Here's how to listen to men.

1. He Talks Like You

The common belief is that women talk in code. They say something, but mean something else. That, or they say something and imply something else that comes a bit later in the chain of logic.

Us men do it as well. We might say something, but mean something else too. Not all guys are direct about sex, for example. We like to play your "implication game" as much as you do. Listen up and you'll get onto our wavelength.

2. Repeat His Rubbish

What you might consider rubbish talk from a man, i.e. stuff about sport, babes, etc. is actually stuff that we care about. We said it on our own accord, didn't we?

If you constantly turn your nose up at it, fine. We don't care that it displeases you. But if you jump in occasionally and show that you can be one of the guys, you might just take him off guard and show that you are listening to stuff that he cares about.

3. Our Schedule

Something that particularly drives me up with wall with regards to my wife is that she forgets when I have certain things on. They can be work-related things or social events.

She sometimes plans things just with me and her and when she finds out that they clash with my events, she gets upset. I always make an effort to tell her early. If she simply listened and wrote it down, she wouldn't be that upset.

What men want in a woman is someone who learns how to listen to her man. We might not say much and when we do talk, it might predominantly be rubbish, but we want to be listened to just as much as you do, if not more. Demonstrate that you are listening and your man will appreciate you all that much more.

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What Men Want In A Woman No 43: A Carpenter

What men want in a woman is a carpenter, i.e. someone who is constructive. This is an important task that the wife is meant to take control of. The wife is in a critical position where she's close enough to the man to actually deal some damage to his ego. Obviously, she doesn't want to be contemptuous and purposely hurt his ego. That will drive her away from him. She does have to deal "damage" sometimes, but in strategic ways. Below, I will outline when you should support your man and be constructive and when you should have a go at his ego to be constructive instead.

1. He's genuinely sorry: constructive

There was this one time that I was taking an ex of mine on a date. It was her birthday. I was parking in a space that was quite narrow and accidentally scraped a car. I felt pretty bad, essentially ruining her day.

If she were to have a go at me and put down my parking skills, there could not have been much that we could have gained from that in terms of building up our relationship. She instead softened up and simply said, "don't worry, that's OK."

2. He's cocky: "hurt" him

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't cocky at certain times. This bad side of me particularly comes out when I'm playing sport. I'm known to get agro on the court or the field, depending on what sport I'm playing.

She sits from the sidelines and watches me play sometimes. When there's a time out, she isn't afraid to come up to me and physically give me a slap on the shoulder and say, "stop being an idiot. You're looking like a tool out there." That humbles me and makes me focus on the game instead of me.

3. He's arguing with you: either/or

This is a particularly sticky situation that I wouldn't feel comfortable giving one answer for. There have been times when my wife has bagged me when we got into an argument about something that mattered to me where I've come close to walking out the door.

In other times, she hasn't attacked me and instead got more and more upset through the course of the argument. If she'd simply maintained her composure and told me to harden up, that would have actually diffused things. Just get to know your man and you'll learn what to do.

What men want in a woman is a carpenter in the relationship, i.e. someone who is constructive and will build them up, not tear them down. This involves knowing when to attack and when to support the man. If you do it right, he will respect you and cherish you for making him a stronger person.

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What Men Want In A Woman: Ladies First

What men want in a woman is confidence to make the first move. Traditionally, men are thought to be the leaders, the pursuers, the ones who take action. If there ever is a woman who exhibits these traits, she is inherently attractive to men. Us men secretly would love it if a woman took more action and initiative, especially in matters deemed to be important to both of us. It's just something that would be really impressive, especially if the woman isn't like that usually. Here are three ways that my wife initiates that impresses me:

1. Gets to know my friends

Whenever you're out with friends, you always expect that your wife is somewhat close off. Maybe she isn't naturally sociable, maybe she's just shy. We all know that it would be awesome if all our friends got along, simply for the introducer's sake.

As the wife, she's an important "friend", so if she made the effort to chat and get to know my friends, it'd be like knowing me better too, since my friends make me who I am. It also shows that you (the wife) are a good catch as well.

2. Plan the night

The importance of "dating" even after your married is important, simply for the sake of keeping things fun. Of course, I'm referring to dating your husband, not another man. Even when you were dating, the man probably had the last decision as to what to do. How do you think he would feel if you called the shots this time round?

Having you take him around here and there, it would seem sort of weird, but trust me, us guys do also like being spoilt once in a while as well. Makes us appreciate you more too, for putting in the effort.

3. Deals with strangers

This is something else that everyone is usually uncomfortable to deal with. Whether it be someone at the door, someone on the phone or someone in public, dealing with people you don't know is an everyday occurrence. If we're out together, it's usually the male that deals with them.

If the woman did it, it would strengthen us. We would be able to back each other up (if the stranger was threatening) and basically keep an eye out for each other. Not many wives do this but believe it or not, us guys would love you to support us out there.

Ladies, it's your move. What do you propose to do to see to it that your man loves you more than ever?

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What Men Want In A Woman: Just The Facts, Ma'am

What men want in a woman is someone who doesn't jump to conclusions. Us guys say things as they are, but sometimes, this can be misconstrued as meaning something completely different. Often, the degree of how different the meaning of what we say can be thought to be depends on your mood and how you're feeling at the time. It takes a lot for a woman to put all that aside and to see facts as facts. If you don't, you may be causing unnecessary pain in the relationship that could result in distance between you and your man or even worse, a divorce. Here's three things that women tend to assume that cause trouble for relationships.

1. Lateness means no respect

Some people are always tardy. You can't help that. They come over to your house, party or function late, simply based on how they feel. Of course, this could be the social norm from where you come from, but if you make it clear you want them there at a certain time, they have to be there.

When us guys are late, it could be for so many reasons. Maybe we were late because you left us a lot of things to do before we got to your place. We could be late because of traffic. We could be late because of things out of our control.

2. We're Lazy When Really We're Not

Some guys come back home and they're absolutely drained. They have no more energy to even move. Maybe they're newlyweds and they're working two jobs to try to keep the ship afloat. That's fair enough.

What's not fair enough is when the man is deemed to be lazy when he's really been doing a lot for the relationship. Maybe he's had a rough day at work. Maybe he's had a rough encounter at work with the boss/colleagues. Whatever it is, think about how our laziness could really mean that we're just tired.

3. We're Being Stingy

This is probably one of the most common things that women assume that causes havoc in a relationship. Men are stingy with their money. I'd be the first to admit that I'm pretty stingy. My wife hates it, but I'm stingy for a few good reasons.

I'm often thinking about the future and having money to spend on gifts for birthdays for other friends. They can get pretty expensive. Another big thing that comes out of my account is simply bills. She has paid before, but I pay most of the time. If I could pay more, I would.

What men want in a woman is someone who sees things as they are and doesn't insert any unnecessary emotion into her thoughts. The last thing we want is to upset you without even trying.

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What Men Want In A Woman: A Woman Comfortable In Her Own Skin

What men want in a woman is someone who is comfortable being themselves. There is nothing more unattractive than a woman who feels that she has to put on a mask whenever she's out with different groups of people. There's being considerate and respectful for your elders or your superiors and then there's just being plain conceited. Being comfortable in your own skin has numerous benefits that are actually crucial for a healthy marriage. What are they? I'll discuss them below.

1. Confidence

Ah, confidence. That word that gets thrown around so much and yet is so hard to understand. People seem to know what confidence is when they see it in other people, but it's one of those things that seem pretty hard to find in yourself.

I'm sure you would be aware of when you are feeling confident or not. It's a gut feeling, isn't it? Here's something that I hope you will realize one day. This is from someone who used to lack confidence, then discovered the truth about it: "confidence isn't something you learn, or get. Everyone is born confident. You just have to learn how to act yourself when you're most comfortable. That is your natural confidence."

See the parallels with being comfortable in your own skin?

2. Easier to love

No joke ladies, if you want your man to love you more, simply stop trying so hard. If you put in the effort to look pretty and all, we'll appreciate it sure, but realize that we got married to you not because we want to see you with make up every single day, it's because we want to see you every day as you are.

Make up is there to show off, not to hide. If you've made hiding your imperfections a habit, it's something you've got to unlearn if you want your man to love you more.

3. Happier!

Women who are comfortable in their own skin don't try so hard in life. Because they don't try so hard in life, they take it easy. Because they take it easy, they're not as stressed out. Because they're not as stressed out, they're happier. Because they're happier, they're more comfortable in their own skin.

See the pattern there? It comes back to how you feel about yourself and the extent that you let other people affect your perception of yourself.

What men want in a woman is someone who loves themselves the way they are. Us men don't get married to you for what you want to be. We get married to you for what you are. If you take her away, it's going to hard to love someone who you're not.

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What Men Want In A Woman: The Body

What men want in a woman is a woman with a beautiful body. There, I said it. I've held out long enough, but there's only so much a man can do before he has to acknowledge the beauty of the female body. I can vouch for most guys when I say that the female body is best when the female is fittest. Note that I said fittest and not skinniest. You can be big but fit. Conversely, you can be skinny but unhealthy. If you aren't doing at least once exercise daily (any exercise), you are hurting your chances of having your man around for much longer. 3 reasons why are below.

1. Let's Make Babies

I'm going to get straight to the point here: we are all here to reproduce. We're all here to make babies and make sure that our lineage exists in the next generation. It's biologically proven and we've been doing it for thousands of years.

A fit woman in the man's eyes is a better candidate for our child than a woman who's unfit. We don't want an unfit women looking after our child. We want the best for our child, so we want our wife to look after herself first.

2. Self-Respect

Woman who are fit look after themselves. They spend more time on themselves and make sure that they're physically fit and attractive. Hey, if you work hard to look good, then you deserve to show it off, girlfriend!

Ahem. But seriously. We all know that the person who spend a lot of time on themselves values their time, so the time they spend on a person instead of themselves must have a lot of value. We come to appreciate those sort of people for the value they put on us. Do you value your time?

3. Live Longer

Again, I don't have the scientific proof, but it's pretty safe to say that the more active you are, the longer you will live. Pretty straightforward stuff, isn't it? If you care even a little bit about yourself, you will put in the effort to make sure that you hang around for many years to come.

Seriously, if you simply do just 20 push ups a day, your body will adjust to that. You will get fitter, stronger, healthier and sexier. It's even more important as a wife, since you'll be so much busier, what with kids a job and a husband.

What men want in a woman is someone who's fit. She has so much on her plate, so it's important for her to be in tip-top shape. By looking after herself, she's basically looking after her marriage.

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What Men Want In A Woman: All Things Feminine

What men want in a woman is a woman who knows how to be a woman. Confused? Let me explain. Men get married to women because they like women. True? OK. What do men like about women? Plenty of things! We could go on and on and on about what we like about women until the cows come home. There's a joke that's been around for eons and that's women stop being women when they become wives. Why should that be true? You can be just as feminine and sexy as a wife than you were when you were dating. Here's how.

1. Stay in shape!

This is probably one of the best starting points when it comes to staying womanly. We love the curves on a woman. Some guys love it when the girl has a bit extra (like me). However, there will be a certain point where it's just... too much.

I'm not asking you to be an anorexic. All you have to do is stay in shape. Don't lose weight, just be healthy. When you're healthy, you're happier and less stressed out too.

2. You're a woman before a wife

This is a good mentality to have. A lot of women are so busy being a wife that they forget to be a woman. They basically become a mother. What man finds their mothers attractive? They wonder why the man stops finding them attractive.

It might be a lot harder, but there's no reason that you can't continue doing the things that you did when you and your husband were still dating. Having that one day or night just to yourselves is important for the health of your marriage.

3. Ask Your Man!

You shouldn't forget the best resource for finding out how to be womanly if you think that you've lost touch with your inner femininity: your husband! Ask your husband what he found attractive about you and work to make up for lost ground.

Also, try out new things for couples and singles, such as classical dancing or pole dancing, respectively. Whatever it takes to be more female to your man. The keyword here is to your man; don't do something that turns him off! Make sure to ask him first!

What men want in a woman is a woman. Remember: you're a woman before a wife! Have that mentality if you want a happy, long-lasting marriage.

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What Men Want In A Woman: Women Who Are Quiet At The Right Time

What men want in a woman is someone who knows when to be quiet at the right time. It's been proven that women can speak up to 5 times as much in one day as an average man. Then again, women can choose to say nothing at all, if they wish scare their man (ie. the cold shoulder). Contrary to popular belief, men do know how to listen, it's just that we don't like it when women inject unnecessary emotion into a situation. We want to solve it, but we find sometimes that women make it harder to solve by voicing their thoughts. Here's how to know when speaking is not getting through to your husband.

1. We don't respond to you

Men have this technique called "stonewalling" where we simply block our wife out if she find that she's not making the situation any easier to solve by being too emotional when she speaks.

It's not that we don't care, it's just a natural mechanism we use to try and focus on what's important. Women can say things multiple times before it gets through to their man. If he stonewalls, that's a sign that he's heard it enough times.

2. We do something else

Something else men do to communicate to their woman that they've heard them loud and clear is that they get up and do something else instead of listening to their wife.

By doing something else, we give the impression that we're busy to you. We want to deal with the problem, but as long as you're saying too much, there's not much we can do. That's why we try to do something else until we figure out how to fix the problem.

3. We yell

As much as we don't like it, we sometimes have to yell to make ourselves heard. Yelling is almost like hitting a woman to us, so we try and refrain from it (that's how I feel about it anyway). However, if we have to get through to you, we'll do it.

Sometimes, it's enough to get through to a woman. Other times, it makes thing worse. At any rate, it's a sign that we don't want to listen anymore.

What men want in a woman is someone who knows that we've heard enough. If you're talking simply to be condescending, that's just annoying. However, if you're upset about something and trying to get us to listen, if we stonewall, do something else or yell, please understand that we're just trying to tell you that we've already heard you.

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What Men Want In A Woman: Someone Who Sees The Lighter Side Of Life

What men want in a woman is someone who doesn't take life so seriously. A lot of couples plan out their entire lives together, only to find that due to a small hiccup, eg. Unexpected baby, death in the family, promotion, etc. their entire plans are thrown out of balance. If you can't adapt to change that might happen tomorrow, you could be doing your marriage damage. Men who marry women who can take it easy and who realize that everything's going to be OK have lower stress levels. Their men also appreciate them more for not making matters worse. Here's three ways you can see the lighter side of life, starting immediately.

1. Realize that nothing is forever

When did you last see your husband? This morning, before he left for work? Yesterday? A few hours ago? Anything can happen. He could be gone, in an instant. He might slip and fall. He might have a heart attack, or a brain haemorrhage.

Women who plan to have their man around forever get destroyed when this sort of thing happens. Their entire future is in tatters. That won't be you if you realize that all things come to an end. Make the most of your man while you can. This will change your mind set for the better.

2. Everything will be OK

Sometimes, things are going well. You're cruising through life. You're married to the man of your dreams, he's got a good job, you're both stable. Then BAM. He gets fired, you're left with a mortgage and things don't seem so certain anymore.

People who cling onto hope, perish. People who get depressed don't pull through. People who face up to the reality of the situation come out the other end stronger. All because they realize that everything will be OK. It's not the end of the world.

3. Laugh at little things

Remember when you were a kid and everything was funny? Why can you be like that right now? I often laugh at dumb things, like when someone falls over. Is that considered immature?

It shouldn't be. If your man is overly serious, get him to live in the moment and find humor from the little things in life. He'll appreciate you for it.

What men want in a woman is someone who can teach him how to laugh and enjoy the little things in life, someone who they can pull through the tough times in life with and someone who realizes that every moment spent together could be their last. It's hard not to love a woman like that.

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What Men Want In A Woman: Positive Women

What men want in a woman is someone who is positive in life. This isn't another article about telling you how to see the glass as half-full, it's more so an article that explains why men need a woman who is positive. If she is positive about her outlook in life, as well as how she feels about herself, the man will shower her with affection naturally. There's nothing you can't love about a woman who's positive, unless she's unnaturally positive all the time. Here are three aspects of life your husband wants to see that you're more positive about.

1. Yourself

You can't love anyone who doesn't love themselves. Some women simply can't take it if they give themselves praise. They think that by praising themselves, they're relaxing, or dropping their guard.

What's so attractive about a woman who's on guard all the time? My sister is an example of someone who is never happy with herself. Whatever you have, someone else might kill to have.

2. What you own

There are plenty of women out there who wish that they have more than what they currently own. They either express their wishes to their husbands, or they simply envy other women who have more than they do.

Like I said in the previous post, you have a lot that many women would never even have the chance to own. By realizing this and being more appreciative of what you have, you will start emitting vibes that make you easier to love. That's also how the abundance mindset works!

3. Us! (your husband)

Us guys aren't perfect. You did get married to us, so can you remember why you married us? If you can't remember, just realize that plenty of women out there die alone. Would you be happy dying alone?

Of course you wouldn't. No one would. If you're more positive, hopefully you're come to appreciate us more too. Maybe the reason that you're not getting much love from us is because you're simply taking us for granted.

What men want in a woman is someone who's positive. She appreciates us for what we are, what she owns and her own assets. Women who can do this are easier to love. If you think that you're not positive enough, just take a trip to some of the seedier parts of your town. Or if you get the change to go to a third-world country, that will open up your eyes.

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What Men Want In a Woman: Drop It

What men want in a woman is for them to let sleeping dogs lie. I don't know about you, but my wife loves occasionally pulling out the odd embarrassing story about me and letting all my mates know about it. She knows I hate it, but she does it anyway. That's OK. What's not OK is when the wife uses that negative aspect of her man as a weapon against him in an argument, simply for the intention to main and hurt. Not cool. There are better ways to make a point in an argument against your man where you don't have to go for the jugular. Here's three ways to argue with respect.

1. Use logic

In general (and that's a very big, "in general), women argue with emotion while men argue with logic. Now, I'm going to get a lot of, "Oh Jack, you're so sexist, that's not true!" I know it's not true, but bear with me here. If you use emotion to argue, you're never going to get anywhere, regardless of what gender you are.

Use logic to argue your argument. Although most arguments tend to be emotional, if both of you try to keep it logical and rational, you actually work things out.

2. Ask Him What He Wants

Pretty simple, but most people simply end up arguing for the sake of arguing. It's pretty stupid, but people do end up doing that a lot. As someone who studied marketing, I'd like to apply an analogy to this situation.

If you want to solve your market's (your husband's) problem, simply ask him what he wants and give it to him. No point wasting oxygen getting nowhere. Ask him, give it to him, problem solved. He'll get used to doing the same for you.

3. Verbal Judo

This is an effective technique that has been around for quite a few decades now. It basically revolves around the concept of the Japanese martial art, Judo. In Judo, you don't throw punches. You absorb the direction your opponent's punch is going in so no one gets hurt.

In a verbal argument, the equivalent of doing this is asking something like, "I see you're upset about [this]. How would you suggest we fix this problem?" No accusations, no anger. Just cool, calm collectedness.

What men want in a woman is someone who knows how to argue effectively. It's impossible not to argue. If you argue without emotion, you're already half way there. Try these three ways and your man will notice the difference and will appreciate you more afterwards.

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