From the time we were infants, our parents told us to "be nice." For the most part, it's good advice; however, in a relationship, some men become too considerate, too helpful and too kind in an effort to seemingly align their lives with a woman's wishes. Don't be one of them. Women appreciate a gentleman, but they don't respect pushovers and they don't feel attraction for "nice" guys who always kiss up to them. Here are 10 signs that you're too nice.
1. You give too many complimentsWomen love compliments, but if you make too many or too big a compliment, most women won't believe you and will wonder what you are trying to sell them.
2. You're too understanding
Constantly trying to understand a woman's point of view as she walks all over you isn't being tolerant; it's being spineless and allowing yourself to be a doormat. Yes, being unfailingly understanding and considerate towards a woman may keep you in a relationship (for a short time) and prevent arguments and clashes with her, but it won't gain her respect and admiration.
3. You're always available
Always being available makes women think that you don't have a life of your own and actually lessens your own attractiveness, making you far less desirable.
4. You're always buying her gifts
Even though the thought is nice, the concept of constantly showering a woman with gifts will begin to lose its meaning and eventually she will become less thrilled and even annoyed receiving them.
5. You agree with everything she says
Guys that are too nice agree with everything a woman says, thinking that's what she wants. In reality, women want someone who is going to stimulate their minds and challenge them.
6. You let her choose everything
Not all of us like to make decisions, and deferring to your woman is OK sometimes; however, letting her call all the shots about EVERYTHING and EVERYWHERE you go is not good. Women are not turned on by men they can completely control and you do your relationship a good bit of damage when you show yourself to be indecisive.
7. You always pay for everything
With the traditional etiquette of a gentleman, guys have always been taught that paying a woman's way is the right thing to do; however, paying for stuff shouldn't always be left to one person. You don't have to split everything down the middle, but there does come a time in a relationship when the financial load should be shared.
8. You're too accommodating
Being helpful is one thing, but if you get in the habit of doing every little thing for her whenever she wants, she'll come to expect having her own butler and chauffer around on a regular basis -- not a boyfriend. If running an errand is convenient for you, help her out by all means. But don't be afraid to put your foot down either.
9. You're too respectfulin the bedroom
While every woman appreciates a gentleman, there are certain arenas in which you can be too respectful, particularly in the bedroom. Yes women deserve respect and they want you to be delicate with them for the most part; however, in the bedroom, women appreciate spontaneity, assertiveness and a sense of adventure and passion.
10. You're too interested in her
Becoming more interested in a woman's life than your own will ultimately make her bored with you. Yes, you want to take an interest in her career, her hobbies, etc...but it's a bad sign if you abandon all of your aspirations, neglect your interests and bail on your friends just so you can concentrate all of your energy on her.
Olderbutwiser is the author of Dating For Today's Man -- The Online Dating and Relationship Guide For Men. More articles can be found at Dating For Today's Man.
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